Waring blenders and microscopes

[largely bastardized from a journal entry I wrote this afternoon, while sitting in the Muddy Cup and eavesdropping on a group of nursing mommies and social workers]

I’ve spent the past two days mulling over the best way to write this – not because it’s a difficult topic, but because it’s important to me and I want to write it well. I didn’t come up with any great ideas though, so I guess I’ll just jump in and see what happens. I completed my teacher training this past weekend; took my final exam on Saturday, and had the last class session on Sunday. I had the impression that no one wanted to leave at the end of Sunday’s session. Certainly I didn’t…. Now that it’s over, I find myself in familiar, well-worn territory: reflecting on and contemplating that which has been…

…there are things I understand better now than I did before the training. I get what samskara means now, having caught myself building new samskaras around the prospect of student teaching. I get that tapas and svadhyaya are necessary conditions of ishvarapranidhana; we need to study ourselves honestly and work earnestly in order to produce something of value to offer up. And I get that, as the Bhagavad Gita says, we are entitled to our efforts, but not to their fruits. It’s not about self-denial. It’s about mindset. Work becomes its own reward when it is undertaken with honest intention and diligent effort. Work ceases to be work, and becomes something almost sacred; a covenant between self, Self, and That-Which-Lies-Beyond-Self-And-Permeates-All. For some, this means god. For me, it means Love.

I often shy away from the use of superlatives, but as regards my instructors and fellow trainees, I can say without equivocation that they are the finest, most dedicated group of yogi(ni)s with whom I could have hoped to share this process. A more generous, courageous, grateful cohort is difficult for me to imagine. I am honoured to have had the great fortune of practicing with and learning from them, and I look forward to continuing to practice with and learn from them, in whatever form that may take. So thank you all – fully, completely.

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5 Responses

  1. This has nothing to do with your post – but analytics – you know, tells you who visits your site for how long and how they got there and what they searched for, etc…

  2. ‘saright, not one of my better posts… Ah, now I think I understand about Analytics. But I got scared off by the terms and conditions which I didn’t want to have to read, so I think I’ll forego signing up. Plus, I basically just have a blog to give me an excuse to sit and write… I’m very glad to have a few readers, but the writing is the thing!

  3. I’ll be up there 4th of July weekend weather permitting and will search for your face so if some strange woman yells Squirrel at you, you’ll know who it is…

  4. You know, I’ve been meaning to tell you that the next time you take your private jet or whatever up to the Gunks, you should drop me a line. Let me know if you want to make a more solid plan than shouting Squirrel at random people on the street (not that there’s anything wrong with that, especially in New Paltz).

  5. Normally I’d say yes but I’m feeling slightly overwhelmed these days and the thought of planning one more thing has me quaking in my shoes. I do know some of our out of town friends are staying at the hostel. And I do know we like the place with the big salad bar. I guess I could always email you my cell if you are willing/able to hang out with crazy people you don’t know.

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